Knock Knock

Made for iPhone Duo, where the hinge is your front door. Shut the phone and someone knocks on the cover. Peek through the peephole, answer "Who's there?", then open the phone to find the punchline waiting on the porch. On every other iPhone the screen is the door: swipe it open on its hinges. No ads, no in-app purchases, no accounts, no tracking. Every joke is in the box. BUILT FOR THE FOLD On iPhone Duo the hinge is the door. Shut the phone and the cover screen is the inside of your front door: knock on it and whoever is outside knocks back (try shave-and-a-haircut), or peek through the peephole to see who is waiting. Open the phone and the inner screen shows your door and the porch. On every other iPhone the screen is the door: swipe it open on its hinges and swipe it shut. TELL ME A JOKE Tap the big red button and someone knocks. Tap "Who's there?", hear their name through the door, tap "____ who?" and the punchline only comes when you open the door and see who is out there. A lettuce in earmuffs. An owl in round glasses. A yeti who is freezing. BA DUM TISH! Confetti everywhere. SAY IT OUT LOUD Turn on voice mode and the door listens for "Who's there?" and "... who?" You say it, the visitor hears you. It all happens on the iPhone: recognition is on the device, nothing is recorded, and nothing is sent anywhere. Prefer tapping? The tickets work just as well, and voice mode is off until a grown-up says yes. 38 CLASSIC JOKES THAT LAND Food, animals, names, spooky, holidays, school, silly and the very worst groaners. Every one is a proper pun on the reply, kid-safe, and told by a cartoon visitor who suits it. A shuffled bag means you hear every joke before any repeats. Now and then the doorbell rings instead. THE GROAN METER After every punchline, give it one to five stars, from Meh to GROANER! Four stars or more and it lands in your favourites, so you can tell it again. PORCHES FOR EVERY SEASON The porch changes with the month and after dark, with its own scenes for Valentine's, Easter, the Fourth of July, Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas, and a wreath that swings on the door. Six painted front doors (classic red, navy, forest green, barn, castle oak and bank vault): keep your favourite, or mix them up so every joke comes to a different one. Choose the porch, the wreath and the knocker in Customize, then jiggle the handle, rattle the knocker and bounce the wreath. JOKE OF THE DAY, TELL A FRIEND, MAKE YOUR OWN A new joke every day with a streak for coming back. Party mode turns the phone into a script: it shows you what to say, your friend answers, then you open the door to show them who it was. Or write your own who and punchline, pick the visitor, and share it as a picture (sharing sits behind a grown-up question). KIDS MODE AND BIGGER TEXT Kids mode keeps to simple jokes and friendly visitors. Text size is adjustable, and read-aloud voices are built in. Vintage carnival-poster art, synthesized knocks and rimshots, no ads, no accounts, no tracking. Just corny jokes and a door.